a day to whine

Posted on 28 March 2008. Filed under: breastfeeding, daycare, family, money, SAHM, work |

Today I’m going to whine. It’s my blog so I get to decide. You get to decide if you want to read it or not. mmmmmmkay 🙂 Now that we’ve got that straight let me start off by saying I’m in a piss poor mood. This post probably won’t be that exciting of a read for you but maybe it’ll help my mood for today by just typing away. Sometimes when I’m extremely upset or sad or whatever I’ll write an entire e-mail, read it a few times and then hit delete. It’s weird how that works sometimes. Other times I’ll try that and a few minutes later I’ll be back writing it again because I’ve decided writing it wasn’t good enough, I must send it. That’s usually bad. Trust me.

Is money the root of all evil? Yep. But that’s my opinion. I’m currently looking for a night time job. I get sick of JUST making it. And I get sick of everybody telling me I’m no fun. Well you know what my dears… I’m in control of the checkbook and I know what’s in it so I know how we’re doing. It’s not that I don’t want to have fun… it’s just that we can’t afford it. Seriously, don’t you think that after being IN the house ALL day with all these kids I’m not ready to run out the door and not look back for a while. People with other jobs have much more freedom than me. If I wanted to go somewhere during the day I’d have to pack up 5 kids and myself and then figure out how to keep them together and under control while we were wherever it is we wanted to go. And at night I try to put my house back together so I’m ready with bottles for baby and the kids the next day and laundry so you all have clothes to leave the house. Wow is everybody thinking I’m the biggest bitch ever right now? I’m not even sure a night time job is going to be good for me. I thought this staying at home thing would mean a little more time with baby but because he’s home, he’s good and I spend my day worrying about everybody else. Potty training and snacks and disciplining and cuddling everybody before nap time and all that fun stuff. Trust me I spend lots of time cuddling baby during the day too, but it’s not what I expected. So then I get a night time job and then I miss out on more time. Isn’t life just one big vicious circle? And seriously all that I just typed started out ALL about money. I’m not a greedy person but aren’t we all entitled to whine a little bit about something we want. Especially when sometimes we’re whining about something we SHOULD already have. I won’t go into that, there’s already enough hard feelings I think. Enough about the money issue.

The daycare thing is going okay. I’m quite irritated today with a parent but at least I won’t be dealing with her anymore. It’s her last day. She asked me quite a few months back if I’d watch her little girl. I said I would and kept a spot for her. Which doesn’t happen right now. There’s so many people needing daycare that we can’t be holding spots for months at a time when others could have been making good use of that spot. So anyway…. the little girl was supposed to start coming here today, switched from her other daycare because A. the lady is pregnant and will soon have a baby and then is quitting B. the lady is sleeping during the day and not watching the kids C. the little girl fell off a glass coffee table taking the glass with her and falling into the middle of it because she wasn’t watching the kids again and D. the lady won’t buy any toys so there are like 3 toys for the kids to play with. Those are the reasons the parent told me anyway. So she’s here today and the Mom informed me she’s going to take her to a daycare center because then she can go to daycare and preschool at the same place. Well that’s all fine and dandy but don’t wait until the last minute to tell me that. I BELIEVE she waited until the last minute because she needed somewhere for her kid to go when the other lady couldn’t watch her (such as TODAY! And numerous other days this month.) and her other daycare wasn’t ready to take her. Anyway…. inconsiderate asses piss me off SO bad!! Don’t screw me over, I tend to get a little bitchy.

As for getting paid after that whole issue – it’s better this week. Hopefully it continues because like I’ve said before, I like the kids I have right now. The little girl that’s leaving I’m not going to miss. She’s a hitter and it’s so frustrating. And the tantrums…. yeah I won’t even go there.


Just thought I’d warn you all, I’m pretty sure my brother would have been like WTF!? I don’t want to read about that! haha

I’m having a SUPER hard time after quitting breastfeeding. I can’t believe what is does to your boobs. It’s just not fair. Come on now I did the work to be pregnant, that destroys the body…. then I do the work to breastfeed and that destroys the boobs. I guess I’m just not accepting my body right now. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve said a million times how excited I was to breastfeed baby and wouldn’t trade that opportunity/bonding experience for anything…. okay well maybe I’d trade it for a new set of boobs right now…. OKAY I’m kidding! Geesh! I wouldn’t even trade for that. What I think is there should be something in insurance to repair the body after birth 🙂 That’s a dang good idea right…. a little policy to say… get some new boobies… rid ourselves of some stretch marks… a nice little workout program to help tighten those abs again… daycare expenses to get all this done. That’s a good idea right?! Yeah yeah, it sucks. That’s why I need that night job. Did anybody else have a hard time accepting their body afterwards? I’m also way smaller than before! Yeah as if the above wasn’t enough… then they have to shrink too!! Come on already!!! Help a girl out. I’m so dang flat chested. I can’t even wear all those fun girly tops because I have NOTHING to put in them 😦 SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS.

Okay it’s taken me all morning to write this because I have too much going on to be here typing. So I’ll say Ciao for now. HUGS TO ALL!


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3 Responses to “a day to whine”

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Warning: Coming from a dad…

We all go through ups and downs. Hang in there and don’t be afraid to bitch every now and again. We just had our third and my wife breastfed the first two for over a year (the newest is 13 wks).

She is none too pleased about the female portions of her anatomy caused by feeding the kids.

I’m trying to accept my boobs. I have no idea what they’ll be like once I’m done nursing, they’ve been lactating for almost three years now. I know they’ll perk back a little especially if you do some chest exercises. My nipples point STRAIGHT down and I really have a hard time with that. My breasts aren’t awfully saggy, it’s just that my nipples ended up really low. I hope they’ll perk up a bit again, I’m still young so maybe. I’m trying to accept them, I’m doing a fairly good job of it but I still feel rather unsexy in the boob department. I’ve fully accepted my stretch marks and I’m ok with them. No problemo. If my boobs get smaller I might freak out. They were A’s when I got preggo with Silas and went to DD’s and then down to C where they’ve stayed. AHHHHHHHHH

Sorry things are shitty. I hate money. I don’t much like strangers children either so I wouldn’t fare with your little daycare you run. No way. You’re brave though, you’ll find something that works for everyone.

We are all entitled to have days and posts like these… Sorry you are having one of these moments, and that things are tight. I know how that goes. I would love to go part-time, at least and be home for Little Dude more, but there is that whole needing to pay the bills thing.

Take care!

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